love

i sent out invites to my farewell party yesterday, and i am touring apartments in colorado in a few weeks. it’s silly how I am so beautifully capable of executing big life decisions but it takes me 1-1.5 hours to find an outfit that i feel good in. for some reason, i can recognize that pull from my chest when I know a chapter has ended and another one needs to begin. im the most in tune with myself than i ever have been before. i have never trusted myself more than i have the last few of months- truly embodying that no matter who and what runs in and out of my life, i can surrender to what is.

each day that passes, i feel a deeper ache in my heart knowing im leaving my precious community in austin, the beloved spots i frequent, and the love that surrounds me here. it’s the same right turn onto south congress from my apartment, the familiar faces i see at the yoga studio, the meal at thai fresh i have exhausted but somehow still love, the chaos of zilker and barton springs’ parking lots but the serenity i find in the midst of it all, the cold jump into the springs on a hot day, the skyline crossing south congress bridge that still feels new, the endless shows that my friends center our memories upon, the days and nights with danielle that make me full whole and convince me how deep friendship can mean.

life is ever-evolving, always moving and transforming. each person here has touched my life and my heart in different ways - danielle, thank you for being the person i’ve needed my entire life, you’re the reason i have grown this much. you’ve seen me at my absolute lowest and have witnessed many highs and choose to love me every day. our friendship goes beyond soul-level. katie and felipe, thank you for rooting for me and for the endless memories dancing, laughing, and sitting under the sun. jay, thank you for seeing me for me and listening to me; your love is felt and you make me believe in friendship. james, austin, and russ, i am who i am today because of yall. thank you for making me die of laughter every day and for welcoming me with open arms, your love and support truly healed me. julian and amani, yall have been the most solid rocks ive known and i am so lucky to have had family around the corner that only wants to see me happy. noelle, halle, trish, karin, brooke thank you for teaching me everything i know about yoga, thank you for helping me find my voice, helping me trust and truly face myself- i’m strong and resilient because of yall and the practice we share a love for. damon and karen, yall are the most generous and kind people i know, thank you for loving me like your own kids. ellie, no matter how much life we have lived, being with you transports me back to middle school- our friendships grounds me and accepts me, thank you for your love the last 15 years. JD, Ezgi, Austin, thank yall for your kindness, each of you are a source of light and love for me.

i truly can’t thank you all enough for friendship, mentorship, connection, and love. austin only felt like home because you all made it feel like home.

xx